After being accepted to university, things really began sinking in, and it put me in a pensive mood, so why not blog. The topic on my mind?
Change.
It kind of scares me how close university is, and it's got me thinking about who I am and who I want to be. I find that I can pick and choose my masks and mold them to fit the environment. It's kind of funny how I want a big change but a safety net as well. Anyway, I guess I'm worrying that if I want change too much, I'll fall into the wrong crowds and totally stray away. So while thinking of change and what might happen, this verse came to mind:
Ecclesiastes 3:1-9
A Time for Everything
1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
6 a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.
So after reading this, I'm still really confused, but take some comfort in the fact that there's a time for everything. I guess what I'm trying to say is that whatever happens, happens. And it always happens for a reason. Now I'm thinking that it's not my time to worry yet. It's my time to just be thankful that I made it to this next step in life. I know that I need to trust God more with my life and let the pieces fall, but it's always just so hard to let go of things. I guess I'm kind of feeling that if now's "a time for peace", I want it to be "a time of war"- connecting to amy's 'evil thoughts' thing. I'm practically addicted to drama, and even though it's not the right time for it, and I know that I shouldn't be doing it, it's an addiction. Like every addiction, it's hard to kick.
--sab.
Thank you for your honest sharing. Yes, there is a "time for everything" as God creates these seasons, cycles, rhythms, stages and processes. In fact, each stage/transition in life can be perceived as "trials."
ReplyDelete"Safety net" - what a beautiful term! :) And yes, besides what you have already learned in God, i.e., all those commandments and teachings from the Scriptures, don't forget your Christian friends and your Christian communities...May they continue to play a very important role as your "safety net"! Wherever you go, connect with a local church...But do make the effort to keep up friendship with people you grew up with, be accountable to one another...You need them, they need you too!
After all the reflections under the sun, the Teacher in Ecclesiastes left us with these last words...
Remember your Creator in the days of your youth, before the days of trouble come and the years approach when you will say, "I find no pleasure in them" - before the sun and the light and the moon and the stars grow dark... and when all (troubles come)...Remember Him...Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. (12:1-14)
God bless.